Yes, you saw it here first.
This is the tale of two men, a little girl, a manager, and a helpless server caught in the middle.
Your very own Ribeye was standing at the Micros, putting in an order when suddenly, this semi-tall weird looking man in his late 40’s comes running up to the bar, yelling at the top of his lungs, “HEY, HEY! I NEED YOUR HELP, I’VE BEEN ASSAULTED!” I looked up, seeing that the old guy wasn’t swelling up or anything like that, and went back to my order. He kept yelling.
I finished ringing in my tables food, and started to walk off when the old guy grabbed my arm. Now, I want you all to imagine Mr. Garrison from South Park, as a human. That was this guy. He grabs my arm and pulls me around, and with some really bad breath, yells into my face, “CAN YOU HELP ME? I’VE BEEN ASSAULTED! I NEED THE COPS!”
I didn’t really know what to say except for, “Will a manager do?” I call a manager on the radio, and turn back to the guy. “What happened?” I asked.
“I was playing a game and my niece asked me what ‘Fuck You’ meant. She’s 6 years old! She was pointing to that guy over there’s shirt! I said something to him and he told me ‘Tell her it means to fuck off, and if either of you bother me again I’m gonna nail you!’ I was assaulted!”
The manager came by and talked to the guy. Apparently, old guy wanted us to get the young guy with the offensive shirt out of the building. Manager J with the Backbone tells Mr. Garrison that there’s nothing we can do, it’s a free speech issue. Garrison doesn’t like this, and he and another friend of his walk off.
Maybe 15 minutes later, I’m out on the game room floor taking care of another guest, and I finally see the shirt in question.
I really want one of these shirts by the way. I also see Mr. Garrison and his friend getting up in the owner of the shirt’s face. I don’t pay much attention to it until I try to card the guest I’m talking to, and suddenly, I’m bombarded. “MAKE HIM TAKE THAT GODDAMNED SHIRT OFF RIGHT NOW, RIBEYE, IT’S OFFENDING ME! THIS IS A FAMILY ESTABLISHMENT, I BRING MY NIECE HERE ALL THE TIME. WHY AREN’T YOU TAKING THAT SHIRT OFF OF HIM?! I TOLD YOU TO TAKE IT OFF OF HIM! DO IT RIGHT NOW!” As he’s yelling at me, he’s literally less than an inch from my face. This sets me off.
“Sir, if you don’t get the fuck out of my face and stop yelling at me, I’M going to be the one to lay you out in the floor! You need to take a few steps back, RIGHT NOW!”
“HIS SHIRT IS OFFENDING ME, IT’S JUST PLAIN RUDE! I DEMAND THAT YOU TAKE IT AWAY FROM HIM AND MAKE HIM LEAVE!” About that time, Manager J walks up again, and asks if there’s a problem.
“YOU NEED TO MAKE RIBEYE TAKE THAT SHIRT AWAY FROM HIM!” How the fuck did I get dragged into it other than asking what happened in the beginning? I still haven’t figured it out.
“I can’t make him remove his shirt, it’s a First Amendment Right.”
“NO IT’S NOT! THIS IS A FAMILY RESTAURANT!”
“Wrong, this is an 18 and up restaurant and bar, and if you’re that worried, you shouldn’t be bringing your niece here in the first place.” He escorted Mr. Garrison and his friend out of the building for making a scene. Later, he comes up to me and Mr. S, one of my cocktail comrades, and shakes our hands. “It’s my last night, it’s been fun working with you.” Apparently, Mr. Garrison said that by the time he was done, Manager J would no longer be working for our company.
We went to Manager J the Impartial after that and said, “Since this is Manager J the Backboned’s last night, can we have some key hourly shifts and move up the ladder a bit?”
Does that shirt really offend people to the point of losing their tempers, or was this person just a fucking nutcase? I wanted to throttle this old man. What makes the whole thing worse is that according to all the guests who were in the area, there was no niece with the old man. Manager J said there was no niece when he escorted Garrison out. The old man wanted to start some shit, and chose a guy with a cool shirt who was minding his own business playing games to start his shit with.
I hate people sometimes.
Ribeye
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April 20th, 2008 at 7:58 am
ok, you’re going to hate me for this. BUT- I really don’t like those shirts. As a parent, it just raises questions once they can read, and I have a hard enough time controlling my language much less explaining things to little guys. Now, if the folks that wear them would remember to make sure - like your manager said - that it was appropriate for the establishment, I could care less. BUT- it’s at the mall, it’s at the grocery store.
To each his/her own- really- but have some common sense and don’t wear it just to get attention.
That crazy guy was out of hand, though- there are about 10 other ways he could have handled it if he were so offended.
April 20th, 2008 at 4:47 pm
Fuck you, douche, and go read the fucking bill of rights again. OK?
April 20th, 2008 at 5:10 pm
I bought my adult nephew a shirt he absolutely loved. It was a plain t-shirt, except in tiny lettering on the upper right corner it said “What are you looking at, you little fucker?”
He wore it until it was in tatters.
April 20th, 2008 at 6:11 pm
If you’re going to be that offended by that particular shirt, perhaps you shouldn’t be taking your niece to a bar where alcohol is served.
Personally, I wouldn’t wear that shirt in public. That doesn’t mean no one else has the right to wear it.
April 20th, 2008 at 6:30 pm
The F-word is bad, mmmmm’kay?
April 20th, 2008 at 8:39 pm
“NO IT’S NOT! THIS IS A FAMILY RESTAURANT!”
“Wrong, this is an 18 and up restaurant and bar…”
Brilliant, just brilliant. Viva la 1st Amendment!
April 20th, 2008 at 8:57 pm
It’s not actually a first amendment issue - as long as he’s on private property, your business could ask him to leave, if you were so inclined.
The first amendment only applies to government regulation, not to private citizens or businesses.
While I have “fun” t-shirts that I happily wear in the privacy of my own home, I wouldn’t wear that particular shirt out in public. And I wouldn’t think particularly well of the kind of person who would. It’s not that cute or funny.
April 20th, 2008 at 10:32 pm
To say that this was a Free Speech issue was deeply idiotic. Shirt-guy was wearing that shirt on private property not his own. Restaurant would have been within its rights to tell shirt-guy to get out and come back when he was properly attired (which is what I think they should have done). Yelling-guy, on the other hand, was a big jerk and should have left without the hysterics, taking contact information for your corporate office with him and complained that way, and also tell the manager on duty why he wasn’t going to spend any money there.
Public speech just gets worse and worse every day, and shirts like that are definitely not helping.
April 21st, 2008 at 5:02 am
That shirt says volumes about the person wearing it, none of it good. It’s “cool” only to those without taste or class. As others have said, it’s not a free-speech issue: the manager would have been entirely within his rights to through the shirt guy out, as well as the yelling guy. He should have done both.
April 21st, 2008 at 8:19 am
People who wear shirts like that are losers. They have no other way to make an impression so they resort to shocking people with childish shirts.
April 21st, 2008 at 3:40 pm
It is tacky. But, as you have witnessed first hand, people have a right tacky themselves up through attitude, language, and attire.
April 22nd, 2008 at 3:50 am
I loved your reply regarding the fact that his niece was in a bar. I once worked in a bar that served a Sunday brunch before they made the non-smoking laws and we had a couple try to get a man to put out his cigarette because they had their infant with them. The manager explained to them that they had their infant in a bar and if they didn’t like what went on there then maybe they should be the ones to leave. Those shirts may offend some but people need to remember that if they choose to bring children to adult places they can expect to see things that aren’t G rated. There are plenty of family friendly restaurants for that very reason. The man who yelled at you was way out of line.
April 22nd, 2008 at 9:32 am
What Mr. Garrison should have done is told his niece that the guy wearing the shirt is a very bad man because he is wearing a shirt with a very bad word on it. Good people don’t wear shirts like that and good people don’t say that very bad word.
I would say that Mr. Garrison’s actual reaction was far and away worse than the guy’s T-shirt and would traumatize the niece more than than seeing a T-shirt with an F-bomb on it.
I do agree that it is NOT a First Amendment issue. It is private property so there is no reason why management can’t ask someone to leave for being offensive.
I would also agree that a BAR is not really a family restaurant, like Perkins or Shoney’s, unless it is a family of alcoholics. Yes, I read elsewhere on your site about the shenanigans that goes on behind the scenes at Shoney’s.
April 22nd, 2008 at 10:52 am
as a social studies teacher i can only manage a sad sigh when i see people frame this as a 1st amendment issue - did no one ever explain the difference between what gov’t can make rules about and what private establishments can? Thank you Carol for cheering me up a little…and by the way, an assault by definition does not have to be physical, it is defined as a “violent attempt, or willful offer with force or violence, to do hurt to another; an attempt or OFFER to beat another, accompanied by a degree of violence, but without touching his person, as by lifting the fist, or a cane, in a threatening manner, or by striking at him, and missing him. If the blow aimed takes effect, it is a battery” (from Blackstone)
April 22nd, 2008 at 2:16 pm
1st of all the first amendment doesn’t apply in private places like restaurants, bars, malls, or on airlines. Any business has the right to tell you to get out if they don’t like how you look. There are plenty, plenty of bars with dress codes that wouldn’t allow that t-shirt.
2nd of all the 1st Amendment doesn’t give you the right to be an ignorant little douchebag like the “man” wearing the t-shirt. Ohhh, I have “fuck” on my shirt, I’m soooo cool and cutting edge. Grow up.
The gentleman should have explained to his niece that the person wearing the shirt was infantile, self-centered, and a poor excuse for a human being and that some people are trash and to be ignored.
April 22nd, 2008 at 5:43 pm
Michael C. » The guy with the shirt wasn’t being an “ignorant little douchebag”, he was minding his own business with his friends, playing a game and having a drink. Mr. Garrison was the one causing the scene from the start.
April 23rd, 2008 at 10:33 am
Sorry, Ribeye, but the guy with the shirt is an “ignorant little douche-bag” for wearing that kind of shirt. Mr. Garrison was out of line, but anyone who wears a “cool” shirt like that has the emotional/intellectual level of a 7th grader.
April 23rd, 2008 at 6:43 pm
I think it’s an issue of hypersensitivity over something they can’t even explain. “It’s a bad word.” “Why?” “Um…just cause it is. It offends people.” “Why?” See where I’m going? If you allow the words that much control over you, then you allow the people who wear those shirts the same amount of control. There is no reason we should EVER have taboo in our speech. Many “vulgar” words are emphatic words and should not be curtailed from speech due to someone else’s own sensitivity. When someone can give a compelling argument why such words should be striken from public vernacular, then maybe this issue would matter. But until then, if you don’t want want your children knowing bad language…don’t take them around people. As a parent or guardian YOU are responsible for your child’s/ward’s upbringing, not everyone else. “What does fuck mean?” “Who the fuck cares?”
April 24th, 2008 at 8:44 pm
Obviously, “Mr. Garrison” was way out of line from beginning to end. That doesn’t change the fact that the tee shirt in question was obnoxious in the extreme. I would have no problem with a tee shirt that said, for instance, “Fuck George Bush,” because it is expressing a political opinion. A “Fuck You” shirt is a whole different story, as it is intended to affront and annoy everyone who sees it for no good reason.
April 27th, 2008 at 7:27 pm
Americans think they have the right to not be offended. They are incorrect.