Since I keep saying I’m going to tell you all about what happened, and since so many of you have asked to know, here’s the reason I was suspended from training.

A little over a month ago, on a Wednesday night a co-worker and I were working in the bowling area.  We didn’t split ourselves in to sections, Ms. K (not to be confused with the Ms. K who was fired for calling me a faggot) and I, we chose to rotate.  In hindsight, probably not the best idea.  At any rate…

It was about 8:30 or so, and some other employees came in to bowl.  These employees are notorious for tipping well, so we both wanted them.  I’d just gotten a party of 15, and Ms. K was nowhere to be found even though it was technically her turn.  Since she was nowhere to be found, I decided to go ahead and take the lane.  Everyone there knows that if you miss a greet I’m going to take the table, and in the bowling area it’s always been like that.

I get their beers, and being that I have a bunch of other lanes, and a huge drink order for the 15, it takes about 8 minutes to get the drinks to them.  I had to wait on the bar to make a ton of the drinks, which is why it took so long.  During that 8 minute span, Ms. K is still nowhere to be found.  I take a few minutes to check my other lanes, and I return to the employees to see if they would be eating or on a liquid diet.  About that time, Ms. K finally walks into the room, and sees me at the lane.  She proceeds to start yelling at me about how it’s “bullshit” I took the lane, and how it was her turn.  I replied with “You should have been in your area, but you weren’t for 13 minutes, so back off.”

About 10 minutes go by, and I’m at the computer putting in another order, when one of the managers come up to me.  I see it in her eyes that Ms. K has whined to her.

“We have a situation,”  she says.

“I’m not transferring that check, she should have been in her area.”  First thing out of my mouth.  I didn’t even give her a chance to tell me to do anything.

“Well you may have to, it was her turn.”   Those words, “You may have to” were later turned into “you were ordered to” on the documentation.

“No, I won’t.  She was not back here, and I’m not transferring it.  You can write me up.”  and I walked off, leaving my manager trying to get me back.  A few minutes later, I swipe my card, and I notice that the table has been transferred away from me anyway.  Already pissed off that she came to me in the first place, I go hunting.  I see her in the hallway, and proceed to lose it a little, “How dare you take that check away from me!”  I yell across the hallway, in front of guests and employees alike, including 2 trainees.

“We’re not talking about this here, you need to calm down.”

“No, we need to talk right now!” I continue to yell.  “You’ll meet me in the office right now.”

“You’re not going to order me around,”

“Then you shouldn’t have transferred that table away from me!”

Long story short, I continue to lose it in front of everyone.  It’d been a bad week, low cash flow, bills due, and I was just pissed off.  I go to the office with Manager A, the one who transferred the check, and Managers B and C who didn’t actually witness anything.  I continue to lose my acclaimed temper in the office, and come close to being sent home and suspended, until they figure out that I’m the closer and the other one always refuses to close.  So they cut Ms. K off the floor, and I finish up.

Later, I go into the office to get my “write-up”.  I notice I’m being written up for Insubordination.  It’s also a final written warning.  This means that I refuse to do something again, I’m fired on the spot.  Manager A tells me, “You’ve already been written up for this before,” which is a complete and total lie.  I’ve only been written up for calling someone dumb as a box of rocks, and being late once.

The documentation also says that “Ribeye refused to transfer a check even after he was ordered to twice, saying ‘You can write me up’ “, which is also another lie.  I sign it, intending to talk to the GM the next day.  Conclusion, I was taken off the training schedule for over a month, until I convinced them I wouldn’t lose my temper again.

And there you all have it.  In summary, don’t lose your temper on people when you have trainee’s and guests watching you, it only leads to bad things and lying write-ups.

Ribeye

The time has come, after all of the 4 page comments, for you, Springs1, to think about some things, take some things into account.

You say that you don’t mind if a server upsells you before your order.  What’s the harm in a server asking you if you’d like your margarita to be a top shelf margarita when you just say a margarita on the rocks.  We usually know what we’re talking about, and would rather you have a good tasting margarita than a house one.

In my post, I mentioned about the straws.  You quoted that mention of straws, yet you failed to elaborate on it other than “In the chain restaurants I go to a lot, they DO bring straws”.  Then you go off into a diatribe about fine dining vs. casual dining.

You’ve only quoted three people out of hundreds of thousands of consumers that happen to not like their server to be friendly.  It also seems that you had to search for those quotes.  Trust me, we know the limits.  If someone’s on a date, we do only what needs to be done.  If it’s an anniversary dinner, again, we do only what needs to be done.  If it’s a family, or friends going out to eat, yes, we’re friendly and chatty with them.  When people are in a bad mood, sometimes it’s the only way to make them happy.

You’d also be hard pressed to find a server who will willingly sit and chat with you after you’ve ordered your food but before it’s been entered into the POS systems.  We want your food to be delivered just as fast as you want it to be delivered.  We don’t want you camping because the food takes too long.  We want money.  Long food, regardless of who is at fault, is always ALWAYS blamed on the server, and our money suffers as a consequence.

Who are you to say that good servers don’t have time to chat when you’re slammed.  Sometimes, we get caught up, slammed or not, and we have time to take a minute or two.  That minute or two we spend with you isn’t going to affect how fast the expo pulls your food out of the window, or the bartender gets to the ticket to make your drink.  That minute or two is in all honestly, not usually going to affect your wait time, so stop whining about it, or just tell the server you’d rather be left alone, that gives them more time to talk to the guests who actually enjoy their presence.

With the change issue.  It pissed you off.  Don’t come to my restaurant then.  Most servers (with the exception of those who actually RUN A CASH DRAWER) are either going to round up or down on your change.  If we owe you 5.06, and only give you 5 and a nickel, it’s because we don’t have time to hunt down that sole penny.  Most servers don’t carry change down to the penny, and at a lot of restaurants, it’s in the menu (Jilians) that servers do NOT carry change, and that your change will be rounded up or down to the dollar.  If we owe you 6.70 and we give you 7.00 back, don’t whine about it.  It’s not the restaurant’s money, it’s coming out of our pocket.  We turn in what is owed at the end of the night, and what is left is our money.  We lose out of our money when we do that, but a lot of times, time is a factor in our change making, and we’re not going to sacrifice another guests service over a penny, or a nickel or something that most people don’t care about anyway.  I’ve not had one complaint about it, and this is with me telling the guests that “Hey, I’m short about 9 cents, it’ll be a few minutes before I can hunt it down.  Here’s the rest of your change from your hundred dollar bill”.  Any server who changes a tip on a credit card is reprehensible and should be in jail.  That’s fraud.  But a penny? If you’re going to whine and cry over a penny, then we don’t need you as a guest in the first place.

I’m seeing some things in your overcharge list.  Like the 4 cents.  You bitched over 4 cents (8 if you combine the two).  25 cents for bbq.  Most places  actually do charge for the BBQ and you just got a server that wanted to try for a bigger tip.  Good servers are consistent, and charge what they’re supposed to charge.  My job charges 50 cents to SUBSTITUTE BBQ for another sauce.  Do we agree with it? No.  Do people get pissed when they’re charged for it? Yes.  Do I explain it? Yes.

You got an old menu, your husband got the new one.  Honest mistake, doesn’t mean that you get special treatment over that 50 cents.  It happens.

Most servers will be honest if they forget to put something into the computer, and will gladly have it taken off and get you a free dessert afterwards.  Don’t make such a big deal, mistakes happen, even when you write down the order.

You’re calling a server who admitted a mistake stupid.  How bitchy can we get.  Do you go out just to make peoples lives miserable?

Your Dr. Pepper to coke story has been posted over and over again here in your comments, however, there’s not many people who change their soft drink like that.  Most people are happy to have their drinks refilled at all times.

In closing Springs1, you seem to be a bit ornery, and you and your husband should just stop going out.  Or is he the more understanding one, like most couples with an overbearing, picky, snotty wife, that is embarrassed to be out with you?  I didn’t want to make this personal honey, but you and your long winded comments about how serving should be when you’ve never done it before more than having a busy counter at the donut store has just pushed me over the edge.  I’ve got people e-mailing me asking me to block you from commenting.  Asking me to spam your comments.  I don’t do it.  But don’t think for a minute I’m going to continue allowing you to bash servers over simple mistakes.  Bash them when you go out to eat, and stop telling us how it’s supposed to be.  Get a serving job, and rethink things.  You’re preconceived notions of how it works will fly out the window, and I highly doubt you could handle waiting on people like yourself.  Most people like you cant cut it as servers.

Ribeye

So last night I had to work a private party, with an appetizer buffet set up.  I had to work this party of 24 people by myself, which wasn’t a problem.  The problem started when along with this private party of 24, this private Christian “Lifeway” party of 24, this private Christian “Lifeway” non-drinking party of 24 that only wanted a bunch of diet cokes and dr. peppers, I had to also wait on a party of 9 in our pool room, a party of 4 in the pool room, a party of 8 in the bowling alley, and one of the most ghetto tables I have ever taken sitting on a table behind a lane in the bowling alley.  All this combined makes for a Ribeye that has been cut from the cow, thrown into the ground, and run over by an ancient piece of shit wagon from the Oregon Trail!

First, let’s start with the uber-Christians.  Now I have no problem with anyone’s religious choices, and I’d never bash someone for their religious choice, but please please PLEASE do not do any of the following while I’m waiting on you.

1.)   DO NOT ASK ME TO SIT DOWN AND PRAY WITH YOU BEFORE YOU BITE INTO EACH PIECE OF CHICKEN.

2.)  DO NOT HAVE THE AUDACITY TO ASK ME IF I HAVE BEEN SAVED. 

3.)  DO NOT ASK ME TO JOIN YOU AT YOUR CHURCH.  I DO NOT CARE THAT YOU WERE UP THERE UNTIL 2 A.M. A FEW NIGHTS AGO, SINGING AND SPEAKING IN TONGUES, GETTING THE SPIRIT OF THE LORD.  THAT’S YOUR THING NOT MINE.  I’M NOT AGAINST JESUS, BUT I HAVE MY OWN WORSHIP, AND WORK IS NOT THE PLACE FOR PREACHING.

4.)  DO NOT TELL ME THAT I’M GOING TO BURN IN HELL BECAUSE I’M GAY, BECAUSE I FLIRT WITH THE WOMEN AT MY JOB, BECAUSE I DON’T GO TO CHURCH, OR BECAUSE I ASK YOU TO NOT HECKLE ME ABOUT MY RELIGIOUS BELIEFS.

5.)  THIS IS THE MOST IMPORTANT RULE:  NEVER, EVER, EVER, EVER, EVER, EVER, EVER, EVER, EVER, EVER, EVER, EVER LEAVE ME A FUCKING PRAYER CARD, A CHURCH PAMPHLET, A LITTLE JESUS COMIC BOOK, OR ANY OTHER CHURCHY TYPE OF FLYER OR PAPERWORK AS YOUR TIP.  YOUR PRAYERS DO NOT PAY MY BILLS, AND WE TEND TO THROW THEM IN THE TRASH, OR PUT THEM ON OTHER PEOPLES TABLES AS JOKES.  WE HATE GETTING THOSE THINGS, AND IT’S ABOUT TIME YOU ALL GOT IT!!!!!!!!!

Now that we’re past those rules.  This “Lifeway” party I was forced into taking, with a gratuity I won’t receive until I get my next paycheck in 2 weeks, broke all 5 of those rules during the course of their 2 hour party.  That’s never happened before, and part of me was pretty impressed with it.

Next, we’ll talk about the big party in the pool room.  No one in the restaurant bothered to tell me that it was another private party, and that I wasn’t supposed to be working it.  I started a tab with them.  Lots and lots of alcohol, that ended up getting transferred away from me, along with that nice big gratuity.  It all got transferred to the two servers who actually served them the food.  I worked for 2 hours getting them drunk and building up a tip that I should have gotten.  I ended up getting about 2/3rds of what I was supposed to get.  Had to split it with 2 other servers.  Wanted to strangle management for not telling me about it.  Wanted to strangle the party for demanding that 2 drinks per person be put on the private party bill for me to not be added onto.   Screwed out of money that I worked hard for.

The party of 4 was fine, tipped great.  The other party in the bowling alley, the 8, tipped on top of the gratuity.

Then we come to the ghetto party.  Not just ghetto but we’re talking, pure and unadulterated trash.  Three women, absorbing stools into their asses while wearing next to nothing and making my stomach churn, and a skinny man with rows in his head, naps sticking out all over the place, and faux gold teeth.   Seeing that I’m busy, they saw fit to tell my general manager that I was just ignoring them, when I’d stopped by and told them I’d be right with them.  While they waited for me, they bitched very loudly about how slow I was, when I was running, running in the literal sense, to get things done.  I make it back to the table after dropping off a tray of about 12 drinks to the pool room.

This is how it started:

“Hey everyone, I’m very sorry about your wait, I’ve been running a bit.”  Nothing like being honest, or so I thought.

“Well it’s about goddamn time you fuckin got here, we’re starving.”  says fat bitch #1.

“Once again, I’m sorry it took so long, but I’m here now.  Can I start you all with a couple of “insert signature drinks here”  I pull out pen and book fully prepared to write down their order.

“How many wangs ya’ll give on a orda”  says fat bitch #2. “We be hongry and you took too long”

“There are 8 wings per order, and you can have them in either mild, spicy or bbq”

“We want fo plate of hot wangs wit sum rainch, and fo wadda”  says fat bitch #1.

“Alright ma’am, would you all like the wings as an appetizer or as your entree?”

Fat bitch #2 rolls eyes. “Jus get da damn food and our wadda, and make it snappy”  Ok bitch, let me stab you now.

I go put the order in, and get their waters.  Fat bitch #3 “What about the lemon? It pose to come wit lemon”

“No ma’am, none of you asked me for lemon.”

Skinny cornrow thug trash #1 “we ain gotta ask, you pose to brang it wit da wadda!”  No, moron, I’m not.

“No sir, water only gets lemon when you ask for it.”

Fat bitch #1 “Then go get the fuckin lemon and quit talkin bout it, dayum, we thursty!  You betta brang a like 2 plates of em.”

Thats alright.  2 plates of lemon for your 4 glasses of water = 4 lemonades rung into the computer.

“Where da fuck our lemon be at?”  Fat bitch #3 hollers over the noise of the music and other guests.

“Right here, ma’am, I just had to ring in your drinks.”   I get to the table, and here’s fat bitch #1 again.  “What you mean you had to rang in our dranks?  Aint wadda free?”

“Water is free ma’am, but lemonade is not.  That’s a lot of lemons you’ve been given, and I’m not giving you the equivalent of 4 lemons for free.  So, you’ll be paying for lemonade, or you don’t get lemons.”  I walked off, and hoped to not see them again until I brought them refills.  As I start to walk off, I see them all get up, and head toward the buffet that was set up for my “Lifeway” party.  I see them grabbing chips, and I see them dipping those chips into the salsa on the table, and then double dip.

“What are you all doing?” I ask, walking up to them and trying to put myself in between the 900 pounds of flesh these women represented with no luck.

“I told you we be hongry, and we is snackin while we wait fo oua wangs” says fat bitch #2.

“This food is not for you.  This food is for THIS private party.  This food is blocked off, and is not for the general public.”

“Well why da fuck not?  We had to wait an hour for you to get to us, and we’s hongry!”  says fat bitch #3.

“Because you didn’t pay for it ma’am, they did.  They didn’t offer you said food, and they’re now complaining to management about your eating their food.  Please return to your table and I’ll have your wings out when they are ready.”

“You cain tell my girls what to do like that.  That public food and they hongry.”

“No, sir, it’s not, and if they are caught eating off of this private parties buffet again, I’m going to escort you all from the building.”

Long story short, they got their wings, they threw the bones on the floor, and they talked to my gm, who made them pay for the lemonades I rang up.  I love being backed up by the managers.

I just love serving.  I still ended up making pretty good money, even though I had trash, and had money taken out of my pocket by people who didn’t know what they were doing, and guests who were just plain stupid.

Until next time,

Ribeye

So I’ve been reading some blogs on here pertaining to restaurants and restaurant servers, and some of the things I’ve read have upset me a little.  Some of these customers who presume to tell us how to do our jobs, when they’ve never done our job.  Working in a donut cafe’ does not a server make.  Regardless of what you think it is that we do, there are tons of things that go into serving.

Let’s just jump right into it shall we?

Greeting the table within 3-5 minutes.  I agree with the basic premise of this, and personally prefer to greet my table within a minute of them sitting down, 3-5 if they take a couple of minutes getting settled in or are talking.  I also must say that if it’s busy, and my hands are full, do NOT expect a full greeting or be mad if I stop by for a second to welcome you and inform you I will be right with you.  I can’t write your order down when I have dirty plates, and it is NOT the bussers job to prebus my tables or even to bus them all.  Take into account business volume when you come in.  The best service you’ll receive is the service you get on a slower night.

“Don’t try to upsell after I’ve made my order”.  I’ve read this on blogs, I’ve read this in pamphlets, I’ve even read this on comments on this blog.  Yes, suggestive selling and attempts to upsell suck.  We hate doing it.  If we don’t do it, whether you’ve made up your mind or not, we can be given disciplinary action.  It’s not always about trying to get our check average up just to get a bigger tip.  That is part of our job, and you as the consumer needs to understand that.

“Don’t assume that we need another refill”.  If we walk by a table, and see a drink that is half empty or empty, assume that we’re going to bring you a refill.  If you don’t want it, casually flag us down before we have a chance to make the drink, and tell us you want something else.  Otherwise, once again, we will get in trouble if we don’t do it.  It’s part of our job, whether we like it or not.

“Don’t make small talk with your tables, people don’t want to talk to the waiter, they want to talk to the people they came out to eat with.”  I have to say that only a few people do not enjoy a friendly server.  I personally would much rather have someone make small talk with me while serving than to take my order, bring my drinks, and avoid me for the majority of the experience.  Maybe it’s just that I don’t work in fine dining, or I don’t deal with TOO many snobbish people that think they’re better than I am, but most people enjoy the small talk, and after experimenting with some tables, I made more money from the ones I was friendly and talked with than I did with the ones I was friendly with but left alone.  Most people enjoy talking to other people.  That’s how most servers gain REGULARS.

“Bring back every bit of the change, even if it’s just a penny.  That is the law.”  You’d be surprised how many people in a more laid back environment are offended that we bother to try counting out every cent of change.  They want to leave, and sometimes it’s hard to get a bartender to break a dollar once we’ve given out every penny of our change.  Sometimes we round up, sometimes we round down.  We’re not trying to steal from you, and the fact that some of you have the nerve to get upset over 31 cents is beyond me.  Most servers are honest about it, they’ll tell you they don’t have the jingle change, and most humans don’t care.  As long as they get the bills back, they’re okay.  Besides, what are you going to do, call the cops over a quarter?  They’ll laugh in your face, just like any manager, server, attorney or anyone else.

“Don’t offer dessert until every person at the table is finished eating.”  This I do partially agree with.  I don’t necessarily offer dessert until the end of the meal.  I might say to a guest or group about halfway through their meal “Hey guys, make sure you’re all saving room for a piece of our cheesecake” or something else.  I don’t push it on them at that point, I merely mention it.  If someones on their last bites, I might ask if they’d like to see a menu.  Otherwise, I’ll just wait until the end.  Once again, it’s part of our job, and some places the servers are trained and expected to offer the dessert before the last bites of the entree are taken, once they’re done, most people just want to pay and leave, if we get to them before they’ve finished every bite, they may save it for that piece of cake.

“Don’t offer another margarita (or other drink) after the first margarita (or other drink) is finished, people may want to try something else.”  I have to say, if I see that someone is enjoying their margarita, I’m probably going to say to them “Can I offer you another of the same, or would you like to try ______ next?”  If they don’t want an alcoholic beverage, I’ll then offer a tea or something.

“Bring straws with every drink you deliver.”  I’m sorry, but most restaurants discourage or even tell their servers to NOT take straws automatically with either water or tea.  Especially in a fine dining environment.  That may be why some places the servers just don’t bring them.  THEY’RE TRAINED THAT WAY ON PURPOSE!  It’s the same with lemons on your water and tea.  Most places don’t automatically bring a lemon with your water unless you request it, because half the time it doesn’t get used for anything but table decoration and upping of food cost.  Also, a margarita with salt usually doesn’t merit a straw being that people who want salt usually want that taste while they drink their drink.  The same with glasses of wine, martinis, drfaft beer,  manhattans, mixed drinks (whiskey and coke, etc.), sours, coffee, alcoholic coffee, espresso, milk, juice.  They SHOULD be automatically taken with:  Frozen drinks (pina coloda, frozen margarita/daquiri,  milkshake/malt), fruity drinks (sex on the beach, absolut stress, long island tea and it’s equivalents), virgin drinks, and kids drinks.

Also, DO NOT assume that problems with your meal are your servers fault.  I know more servers who are honest about their fuckups than who blame them on the kitchen.  If the restaurant is busy, then expect that your food may run long and that it’s not the servers fault, especially if said server actually wrote down the food.  Also, if you see a server who is busy that is NOT writing down your order, you are more than welcome to ask them to do so.  Most restaurants require it, especially fine dining restaurants, because it’s very easy for servers to forget things if they are busy.  These days, you’d be hard pressed to find more than 1 in 10 servers who don’t write down orders.  If your server does write it down, and it comes out wrong, then either A)  YOU ORDERED IT INCORRECTLY  B) THE KITCHEN MADE A MISTAKE   C) THE FOOD RUNNER DIDNT READ THE TICKET CORRECTLY.  If it wasn’t your server who delivered the food, then you have no way of knowing if it was their fault or not, so don’t assume that it was.  Just because you are the “customer” doesn’t mean that you are always right.  That saying stopped having meaning LONG LONG AGO!  That saying makes people think that even if they ordered the wrong thing, they’re right in blaming someone else.

I hope this helps some of you with your preconceived notions of how you should be served, and maybe pissed a few of you off.  Either way, I’ve made a point.

Ribeye

I’ve decided to skip part 4 of the “Rules for Eating Out” series, at least for today, in favor of a topic that needs some clarification:  Checking ID’s.

I know it isn’t fun, but if you want to have that alcoholic beverage, I’m going to need to see your ID.  Now, for some things you need to know.

If you were carded at the door, we still have to see your ID if we serve you a drink.  The legal drinking age is 21 years old.  Not 18, 19 or 20.  Some places allow 18 year olds entry, without stamping their hands or anything.  That means we have to be very careful, as we can be busted.  We can lose our liquor license (ABC card).  We can be fined for serving you.  We can be FIRED for serving you.  So don’t try to pull one over on us.

Rule #1: If I ask for your ID, don’t complain about it, I have to ask everyone, especially here in TN.  The new law states that anyone drinking, from ages 21-101 has to have a proper identification.  That means, even if you are old and gray, and we know you are old enough, we still have to see your id just to make sure you have it on you.  It sucks.  I won’t deny it sucks.  I don’t get the law.  I understand if people are young, but not if they’re old.  Just show it, don’t complain about it.

Rule #2:  If I ask you for your ID, and you don’t provide it, then I WILL NOT serve you any kind of alcohol.  I don’t care if you’re legal, I don’t care if you’re old and gray, I’m not losing my job because you want that long island tea.  I’m not paying a $500 or more fine because you forgot your ID at home.

Rule #3:  Just because someone else in the restaurant fucked up and served you a drink without an ID, or served you while you were underage doesn’t mean I’m going to.  I’m not stupid, even if my co-workers are.

Rule #4: If you are underage, and you order a drink and provide ID thinking that I won’t notice the date says you’re not 21 until next week, I will have you a. escorted out of the building.  b. banned from the premises, c. arrested.  Yes, you can be arrested for attempting to order a drink while underage.

Rule #5:  If I ask you to remove your ID from your wallet,  that means, remove your ID from your wallet or I will not serve you that alcoholic beverage.  I’ve had a girl print out a picture of an ID, photoshop her picture onto it, and stick it to a blockbuster card.  Let me be clear.  You won’t be served if you refuse to take your ID out of your wallet.

Rule #6:  DO NOT TRY TO USE A FAKE ID WITH ME.  I’ve had one when I was underage, I know they’re fun to use, and fun to get away with.  They are also very illegal, and we do know how to spot them these days.  Times have changed.  We have the authority to confiscate your fake ID, and we will use said authority.  It’s a game at some restaurants to see how many fake ID’s we can get in a month.  I’ve got 8 from this month alone, and it’s early.  We will also call the police on you, and you will be taken to jail for your parents to take care of.  Just don’t do it.

Rule #7:  Please don’t give me an ID that is cracked, taped, broken into a million pieces, laminated cheaply, or expired.  We cannot accept any of those, so don’t try.

Now that we’ve gone over the rules for using an ID, let me tell you what ID’s restaurant servers and bartenders are allowed legally to accept.

1. State Issued ID card.  That is the card you get from the DMV when you cannot get a drivers license.

2. State Issued Drivers License.  This is the card you get from the DMV when you are legal to drive.

3. Government issued Passport.  Nuff said

4. Military ID.  This does not include family military ID’s, and we do know the difference.  Active and reserve military ID’s we can accept, but family ID’s we cannot.

Now for some that we cannot accept.

1. Driving Certificates.  These are the faux driver’s licenses of some states.  Tennessee is one of them.  It’s for the immigrants that do not have social security numbers.  They are the pinkish purple id’s.  They state very clearly that we cannot accept them as a form of identification.

2. Your social security card is NOT a valid form of ID.

3.  Don’t bring the ID that you bought from some company.  It might say that it can be used as a legal ID card, but it’s not one that we can accept for your alcohol.  

4. Don’t bring your birth certificate combined with your college ID card.  Pointless, and you’ll be laughed at.  

The moral of the story is, if you’re going to come out to drink, have the proper id, and for fuck’s sake, be of legal age.  We are not going to risk our jobs, even for our friends who might happen to NOT be 21 yet, just so you can have a drink.  We’re not going to pay a fine for you, and lose our ABC card so that we cannot serve at a place other than Cracker Barrel or Waffle House.  Get over thinking you’re going to get one over on us, because we’re not going to let it happen.  Our jobs are too important to us.

Thanks for reading,  and expect the last installment of the “Rules for Eating Out” series soon, Rules for Eating Out: The Older Generation.

Sincerely,

The Ribeye of your Dreams