At least, it’s killing the cocktails money.  Our venue’s, the bowling, billiard and game rooms, were the smoking rooms at my job.  Then comes October 1st, 2007, and voila (see that, Tom, I spelled it right this time), no more smoking.

This smoking ban is controversial at best.  On one hand, we have the non-smokers, screaming about their health and how they shouldn’t be forced to deal with second hand smoke.  I sympathize, I do, but then again, I’m also a smoker and you people have taken away yet another of my rights.  On the other hand, people in TN haven’t gotten used to going to a bar and drinking without their cigarette.  It’s not New York, this ban JUST HAPPENED here.

The law says (according to SmokeFreeWorld.com) “Statewide smoking ban takes effect October 2007. All restaurants will be required to be smokefree indoors unless they limit access to people 21+ at all times (including restaurants with bars, chain and hotel restaurants).”  

I’ve heard different variations of this law, one saying that as long as a restaurant has a separate room that can be sealed off from the rest of the venue, and has it’s own entrance and ventilation then smoking will be allowed.  I don’t know how true it is, but we don’t have that separate room so it really doesn’t matter.

I understand that people are trying to protect our bartenders and servers, but I have to say, out of the 9 bartenders at my job, only 2 are non-smokers.  Out of the 15 cocktails, I think there is only 1 that is a non-smoker.  The waitstaff?  Theres 17 of them I think, and maybe 3 non-smokers.  It’s NOT that big a deal to us.  This was just another way for the government to decide how we live our lives, nothing more and nothing less.  If you don’t want to deal with smoking, or don’t want your kids around it, then don’t bring them out to a bar with you games or no games.

We have lost business since this ban.  We’ve lost a lot of it.  My money is suffering, because we don’t have that many people sitting in our area.  Before, the smokers just knew to come to us, and the non-smokers only ate in the game room when the dining room was full.  Now, they just don’t come back there because they’re just so used to coming in the front door and getting a table.

Then there’s the people who don’t want to be compliant.  We have a few guests who refuse to accept the ban.  I respect and admire them, they still smoke even when we tell them to put it out, and I just wish I could be in their place….It’s not a major thing, but it’s a rebellion nontheless.

A few nights ago, I had a group of people in the bowling alley.  All ghetto trash, 2 black guys, a black girl and 2 white girls.  When I say trash, I mean they were bottom of the grease trap trash.  These girls were wearing next to no clothes, and the ankle holders were the biggest I’ve seen in a while.  One of the girls, I went to school with.  She comes from a nice, “WASP” family, well as waspish as you can get in Tennessee.  She used to have class, and now she talks like she was born in a crack house.

As I approach the lane, I’m wondering when I can get outside to have a cigarette for myself.  Then I smell it.  It’s the warm smell of a menthol.  I wondered, could I be dreaming?  Was the ban a hoax?  Nope, no-smoking signs everywhere and we all took the ashtrays home.

“Hey everyone, how are you all doing tonight?”   I ask while looking down at the packs of Newports, Black and Milds, and Virginia Slims.  I really want to smoke at this point, but we have this new “smoking pass” system, and even with that, we don’t get to go from 7-11 because my area manager, Mr. M made it his personal rule.

“Brang us a ashtray.”  Says RayQuisha, she with the alabaster skin and the medusa braids all over her head.  “We ain’t got no place ta flip deez.”

“I’m sorry ma’am, but it’s illegal for you all to smoke in a restaurant now, as of October 1st.”

“What you mean?  Dis ain’t no restaurant, dis be a bah.”  Says LayMishiara, the young black lady, who while ghetto, still had more class than the other two.

“Yes, while I would love to allow you ladies to smoke, it’s no longer allowed in restaurants here in Nashville, and this is considered a restaurant being that we have a full food menu and a full kitchen.”

“You cain be tellin us ta put deez out, we got rights you know,”  says JaHaramarinara, the other white trash, “Dis be becauz we wit deez black men.  You be a racist.”   Fuck you bitch, I’m trying to not lose my job.  I don’t care who you’re getting down with or getting crabs from.  I’m not losing my job because I let you smoke, and I’m not getting my restaurant a fine when the Health Dept. comes in for one of their surprise smoking checks!

“This has nothing to do with race, ma’am, this has to do with you breaking the law.”

“Well you betta go get a fuckin managah, cuz we ain’t puttin deez out.”  Fun times.  I get a manager, who tells them to put them out.  “Fuck naw, dis be bullshit”  I here JaHaramarinara yelling, “We be grew up.  How you just gon tell us what ta do?”

“Because it’s the law, and we’re not getting fined over you.  Put them out or leave, it’s your choice.”

Thankfully the “ladies” didn’t end up ordering anything from me.  I wondered why the two guys kept their mouths shut the whole time, and when the “ladies” went to the bathroom to snort another line or put in a plug or whatever they were doing in there, presumably smoking in secret which will still get us a fine, one of the guys told me “We jus picked dem up at anotha bah.”   He ordered a few Hen and cokes, his tab ended up being like 36 bucks, left me 50 and told me to keep it.

“Maybe dey raggin or somethin, can’t take no bitch out nowhere no mo witout dem ackin a foo’.  Sorry bout dat.”  He ordered long islands for like an hour, and ended up leaving me almost 20 bucks.

This also brings me to wonder why this epidemic of embarrassing trashy females has decided to come out.  Their boyfriends/fucks/husbands are apparently getting tired of it.  As long as they keep tipping big because of these bitches, I say bring it on.  If you can deal with it guys, so can I.  To all you men, white trash and ghetto trash alike that have to deal with a bitchy woman that embarrasses you in public, I respect you for not strangling her.

God knows I would

Ribeye

This is something that I’ve noticed over the past year at my job, whilst hiding smoking in the bathroom…at least until the first of this month when it became illegal.  I’ve noticed a vast increase of guys who use the toilet, wipe their asses and don’t wash their hands.  I’ve taken to using a paper towel to open the bathroom door.  I was trained from a young age that any time you leave the bathroom, you make sure to wash your hands before you do it.  I wash my hands at home, I wash my hands at work, I wash my hands at the doctors office, I wash my hands wherever I go.  It’s just plain nasty to NOT wash your hands, especially if you just got done taking a massive, loud, stinky shit and wiped your ass with sandpaper butt-wipe!

Do people just not know what the health risks are when they don’t wash their hands after using the toilet?  I don’t know if it’s as big a problem with women, as I don’t use the ladies room, but the mens room is already nasty.  I’ve seen fecal matter on the walls, I’ve seen dirty toilet paper on the floor, and I’ve seen toilets full that people don’t bother to flush after filling with their waste.  That’s another one that grosses me out.  Is it just kids that refuse to flush their turds, or is it adults too?  I think it’s both.

I’m sorry, I’d just rather not get a staph infection from not washing my hands, or from touching something after someone else that didn’t wash their hands.  Staph infections are going around everywhere now, and from what I read, they don’t appear to be too much fun.

Another big one is employees that don’t wash their hands.  I’ve seen servers and food runners at my own job that don’t wash their hands after using the bathroom, and yes, I’ve reported them to the management.  That’s just something I can’t deal with.  It makes me want to puke.  I don’t want people with shitty hands touching MY guests food, or even touching my tables, just like I wouldn’t want someone who didn’t wash their hands touching my own food.  This is the reason eating White Castle freaks me out sometime.  I’ve seen that the cooks there do not wear gloves when they’re touching the little burgers.  They don’t wear gloves as they’re filling the fries.  Is it so hard to take a few minutes extra to scrub your hands, then put a pair of gloves on before you touch my food?   All the cooks at my job are required to wear gloves, as are the dishwashers and expo’s.  If they don’t, and are caught, then they get written up.  The last time I caught a cook not washing his hands after using the commode, that cook was fired.

Plain and simple, people MUST wash their hands after any of the following:

Using the toilet

Touching your face/hair

Blowing your nose, sneezing, touching your tits, feeling up someones ass, or wiping your ass.

Eating food

Taking out trash

Or anything else!

If you don’t wash your hands after any of these things, then you’re just plain nasty, and you should be terminated instantly from your job.  Fuckin trash!

Ribeye

I don’t know what makes people think we can make any kind of milkshake they want, just because they saw a flavored BAR DRINK.

Bertha, this evening, a big fat ghetto as Hell black woman, wearing a skimpy red dress that showed about 4 rolls down each side and the thong I didn’t need to see before I went on my bread, decided she was going to be a bitch from the start.

I go to her lane, and the first thing out of Bertha’s mouth was “Where ya’ll damn menu at?”  The menu was sitting on the small “coffee table” right in front of her.  “It’s right here, ma’am.”

“I don’t mane da damn food menu, where da dranks at?”  I pick the drink menu up off the table, and hold it out, thinking she might have the temerity to well, take it.  But she doesn’t.  “What all ya’ll got?”  she asks.  Her boyfriend is on the phone the entire time. I’m not playing her game though.  “Here’s the drink menu ma’am, we also have coke products, except for mello yellow.”

“I want a pretty drank though.”

“We also have  a couple of virgin drinks, virgin daquiri and pina coloda.”

“What about dis one.  I want me dis one.”   She’s pointing to a frozen strawberry banana daquiri.

“Alright, I’ll just need to see your id.”

“I ain got it, but day let me drank here all da time.”

“I’m sorry ma’am, I can’t serve you any alcohol without your id.”  She huffs at this, and I feel happy.  “Den brang me a banana shake.”

“Ma’am, I can’t make a banana shake.  We only have chocolate, strawberry and vanilla.”

“Well if you can make dis banana drank, why da hell cain ya make me a banana mikshake?”

“Because the banana flavoring in that drink is liquor, and you have no id so I can’t bring you any kind of liquor drink.”

“Den brang me dat one wit some goose in it.”  She’s pointing to the daquiri she was pointing at before.

“I’m sorry ma’am, again, but I cannot bring you that drink.  Can I get you a virgin daquiri or a chocolate shake?”

“Fine!” she yells at me, “Since you wont brang me what I want, give me a chocolate and strawberra shake.”  I take this to mean two shakes, and I ask her to confirm.

“No, dumbass, I want da chocolate and strawberra mixed tagetha.”

“Ma’am, I’m sorry that you feel the need to talk to me like that, if you do it again, I’ll have you tossed out.”  I get her funky mixed shake.

“Dis taste nasty.  Ain’t it pose ta tase like chocolate cova strawberras?”

“We’ll ma’am I’m sorry that it doesn’t taste like you wanted, but that’s why we only have 3 flavors of milkshake.”

“Just brang me a damn sprite.  Can’t get no licka, no good ice craim.”

I had to deal with her for 2 hours.  Her boyfriend left a big tip.  She left a note for the managers.  I threw it away without reading it, which, in hindsight, I should have kept it for tonights post.  I’m sure I’ll hear about it tomorrow.

Until then,

Ribeye

Well, the first RagingServer.com poll is now complete.

The results, not much of a surprise, except for those who just want an order taker/food delivery person.

108 of you said that you’d rather have a Casual, Low Maintenance Conversationist.  That’s the serving style of most servers in the industry.  We don’t have time to stay at your table talking unless you are a regular who won’t let us leave.

39 of you just don’t care what we do, you’re still going to leave a good tip.

32 of you just want us to take the order and bring your food and leave, that’s the surprising one.

20 of you like to actually chit chat.

1 of you is worthless and are going to Hell for not tipping at all.  Trash.  Probably Sharece Thomas of the youtube vid a couple posts ago.

Surprising results, I think not.  This weeks poll is a little simpler, having to do with working as a server.  Simple yes or no (almost) answers.

Stupid Name of the Week!!!

Girls:  Arickiara

Sienatta

Lenorithia

Boys:  Alashawndre

Tomirion

LaByron

I’ll be posting another post in a few minutes, dealing with people who order from one place and sit in another.

Thanks

Ribeye

It was a night last night.  A really really looong inbred bumhick night of HELL.  I didn’t make good money from anyone, no matter what I tried to do.  I tried using great service.  I tried mediocre service, Hell, I even tried shitty service.  Nothing worked.  Trailer park hicks are nothing but trash…sister fucking, brother-daddy beer drinking uncle-cousin trash.

First we have the group that smells like a meth lab just blew up all over them.  Kids and all.  “Swate Tay” drinkers.  When I say “swate Tay”, I mean an entire urn, just for the 4 of them.

“Ya’ll aint got none of that there Busch beer do ya?”

“No, sir, we don’t.  Is there something else I can get for you?”

“How bout some milwaukees best?”

“I’m sorry, sir, this isn’t the local kroger.”

“Well what the hell kinda beer do yall have?”

I go through the list of beers with him.  “Ain’t ya’ll got nothin cheap?”

What the hell do you call bud light, high class?

Then we have the couple who eats their steaks burnt, with ketchup.  I’m not even getting into that one because it made me wanna hurl, and I love me some ketchup.

All through the night…”Caint i just get some fries with it?” and “ain’t yall showin a race tonite?”

The last little family of the night was the worst.

The 24 year old with the 13 year old son, whose eyes were on each side of his head, not on the front, like a trout or something, the daddy who i think was also the mothers father, and the wife who thought she was high class drinking a margarita.

This kid was 13 years old, and he didn’t know how to read a single word.  “What’s this franch frees on that burger?”  They must be from Pulaski or something equally hickish…

I so need to get into fine dining…

Tips for the night:  78 dollar bill: 2 dollar tip.

57 dollar bill: 3 dollar tip

100 dollar and change bill, no tip

Maybe if I shot a chicken for them or had on a straw hat or some grease, i could have related better, but no, I was professional about my service, and I got screwed for it.

Ribeye